Thought Bubble

Post this on your bathroom mirror.

Wed, 12 Oct 2011 20:01:17 +0200

Take a step back. Fucking look at yourself. You are human. You are beautiful. You are so beautiful. And you can be anything. You can be everything. Do not hate everyone because someone broke your heart, or because your parents split up, or your best friend betrayed you, your father hit you, the kid down the street called you fat, ugly, stupid, worthless. Do not concern yourself with things you cannot control. Cry when you need to then let go when it’s time. Don’t hang onto painful memories just because you’re afraid to forget. Let go of things that are in the past. Forget things that aren’t worth remembering. Stop taking things for granted. Stop taking life for granted. Live for something. Live for yourself. Fall in love. Fall out of love. Fall in love. Fall out of love. Do this over and over until you know what it is to love someone. Question things. Tell people how you really feel. Sleep under the stars. Create. Imagine. Inspire. Share something wonderful. Meet new people. Make someone’s day. Follow your dreams. Live your life to it’s full potential. Just live, dammit. Let go of all the horrible things in your life and fucking live. And one day, when you’re old, look back with no regrets.

What's next?

Fri, 03 Jun 2011 16:08:16 +0200

Having just completed my Master’s degree (wooohooo!), I am more than just excited. I’m elated, overjoyed, beside myself, ten feet from myself, you name it. I’m enjoying the freedom of not having to rewrite my thesis for what seems like the one millionth time only to spot another error in the new version. I love that I have no impending deadlines, no exams approaching, nothing at all. It’s just me and this beautiful weather, the grin on my face and the glow in my heart. But one question is beginning to gnaw at me: what’s next? It’s a question I knew I’d have to face eventually and as a result have fired off my resume to every company that looks like they could use someone like me. I feel like I’m caught in one of those scenes in inception where the staircases are adjustable and I’m standing on the last step on my staircase except it’s not currently connected to anything. It’s just there. Suspended. Waiting for someone to do something about it. And I’m just standing there - confounded. Waiting to figure out my next move.

Sometimes figuring out what you want to do next becomes so exhausting that relinquishing that duty to someone else seems like an attractive idea. Won’t someone just walk up to me and give me a job and end this seemingly never ending quest for answers or solutions? Or at least just nudge me in the right direction. Right now, that’s what I want. Well— that’s what I think.

It’s 10:38 pm and my diet is making me hungry. Of course I’m gonna go stuff my...

Wed, 01 Jun 2011 22:39:26 +0200

It’s 10:38 pm and my diet is making me hungry. Of course I’m gonna go stuff my face. Instant gratification is what I live for.

Current Status: Daydreaming about a job Now that I’ve done the first interview and I feel like...

Thu, 26 May 2011 13:55:51 +0200

Current Status: Daydreaming about a job

Now that I’ve done the first interview and I feel like I did well - whatever that really means- I can’t help thinking about my future job (I’m claiming it! dammit!). Oh the coffees I’ll fetch, the photocopies I’ll run, the spreadsheets I’ll build in Excel, the documents I’ll print for the 100th time because the last one was missing a comma, the deals I’ll close! Let’s have a round of applause for the world’s greatest intern! I’m reenergized and excited to rejoin the world of those who work but also have total control over their spending decisions. Grad school was a good ride but all good things must eventually come to an end. Besides, this is kind of my dream job if I dreamt or even dreamt about jobs. Now…I’ll just wait patiently by my cell phone while it’s perpetually being charged and placed strategically at the spot in the room where I have full signal.

The universe is fucking with me! It has unleashed some kind of digital ghosts to fuck with my work!...

Fri, 13 May 2011 15:00:32 +0200

The universe is fucking with me! It has unleashed some kind of digital ghosts to fuck with my work! After spending soooo much time translating a document and preparing a nicely decorated table to make my text look not so meagre and boring, said table is now nowhere to be found! What’s strange is that all the words are present, down to the last fullstop, so I know that I’d saved everything but the damn table has disappeared. It has even disappeared from earlier versions that I had saved. And yes, I returned every now and then to admire the beauty of the table or to make some reference to its contents. Now it’s gone and I’m pissed as hell. I need to yell at someone and I’m seriously considering calling up Sun Microsystem’s customer service. Someone has to take the blame and I know it’s not me.

By the way, are you still a customer if the software is free?

Sooo apparently salad is not such a terrible idea with the appropriate dressing. Who knew? I always...

Wed, 11 May 2011 18:30:46 +0200

Sooo apparently salad is not such a terrible idea with the appropriate dressing. Who knew? I always thought it was just too grass-y for me. I’m on a roll with these discoveries today! If I keep it up I’ll be a whole new person by midnight.

I’ve stumbled upon something that has definitely increased my productivity by 500%. It’s...

Wed, 11 May 2011 14:21:16 +0200

I’ve stumbled upon something that has definitely increased my productivity by 500%. It’s called waking up early getting the hell out of bed (or not), and hitting the ground running! Damn, why didn’t I know about this earlier? It’s too good to be true, like one of those items they hawk on late night infomercials except this is the real deal. I can’t believe the day isn’t done yet because I feel like I’ve done three days worth of work and it’s just 2 pm! whew! This is my big Eureka moment- the discovery of my lifetime!

Is it one of those truthy days yet?

Mon, 09 May 2011 09:23:49 +0200

One of my deepest fears is living an unsatisfactory life. Yes, that sounds really vague but it sums it up nicely. It would really break my heart if I spent my years being less than happy most of the time. As is often said, I want to live and not just exist (and believe me I know the difference between the two). I want to feel every moment. Experiencing all the shades of life- crimson is not red and magenta is not pink - is my main desire. I want to spend my days doing things that matter, things that colour the rich tapestry that is my life.

In pursuit of this perennial state of gratification (or in avoidance of perennial boredom) I keep setting new goals for myself then bask in the glow that comes with finally getting something you’ve worked hard for. I suppose that’s what drug addicts feel like with each hit (?)

I saw something once on the internet that read “Three grand essentials for happiness in life are:

   Something to do

   Something to love

   Something to look forward to”

and I couldn’t agree more.

…but then I also fear that I’ll waste my life chasing that high and so I try to remain grounded and convince myself to do what is normal, what is expected. I fear that my need to seek fulfillment betrays flaws I don’t want to admit that I have. I don’t want to say that I’m spoiled, or lazy, or selfish, or avoiding real responsibility. Sigh. Life…

I can’t help using correct punctuation on twitter. I mean, who does that? I’m such a...

Mon, 09 May 2011 09:05:38 +0200

I can’t help using correct punctuation on twitter. I mean, who does that? I’m such a square :/

I went for a run this evening since I was feeling guilty for...

Sat, 07 May 2011 20:57:30 +0200

I went for a run this evening since I was feeling guilty for having hoovered some ice cream earlier today. To make it seem like more of an adventure and not just a regular oh my gawd I hope I don’t get fat kind of gig, I brought my camera to take a few snaps of the scenery and it was worth it. If only I could capture more than just the image but the ambiance in general - the sounds, the gentle wind, the setting sun casting a warm glow on your neck. Nature is lovely.

Is this a sign? lol

Fri, 06 May 2011 17:10:43 +0200

Is this a sign? lol

Dear Employers, I don’t have cooties. Please hire me. Sincerly, Cootie-less R.S.

Fri, 06 May 2011 15:11:24 +0200

Dear Employers,

I don’t have cooties. Please hire me.

Sincerly,

Cootie-less R.S.

So this potential employer does not accept resumes which totally puts me off my game. How am I...

Wed, 04 May 2011 20:25:06 +0200

So this potential employer does not accept resumes which totally puts me off my game. How am I suppose to distinguish myself without my one-pager filled with self-congratulating embellished statements? How do I now, in a “cover letter”, list every trophy in the cabinet at my parents’ house? Why won’t they let me dazzle them and distract them, even for a moment, from the fact that I may not the best candidate? These are serious concerns! I should take it up with the union for slightly over-achieving yet super-lazy people who do not, in any way whatsoever, live up to their potential. Maybe it’s time to start doing things that matter, things that speak for themselves, then I won’t need the acrobatics…but *shrug*

Would it be evil of me to convince my boyfriend that we should stay in and watch the Royal Wedding...

Fri, 29 Apr 2011 11:05:26 +0200

Would it be evil of me to convince my boyfriend that we should stay in and watch the Royal Wedding even though I don’t really give a shit about royal people or weddings?

Now I could let these dream killers kill my self-esteem Or use my arrogance as the steam to power...

Sat, 23 Apr 2011 17:04:23 +0200

Now I could let these dream killers kill my self-esteem
Or use my arrogance as the steam to power my dreams
I use it as my gas, so they say that I’m gassed
But without it I’d be last, so I ought to laugh
So I don’t listen to the suits behind the desk no more

Last Call- Kanye West

So when I told my story about my holey garments on Good Friday a miraculous thing happened - I was...

Sat, 23 Apr 2011 13:11:32 +0200

So when I told my story about my holey garments on Good Friday a miraculous thing happened - I was able to write two full pages of my thesis! Maybe this spike in productivity had something to do with the fact that I took the time to write two paragraphs about something I find mildly amusing and this basically set the pace; or maybe Friday was indeed living up to its momentary title and conferring goodness on all those who dared to seek it; or maybe, just maybe, it was just a fluke. Whatever it was, I am grateful for it and I would love to make this a trend - two pages a day. I believe that with slow and deliberate effort I can produce something that is at least well reasoned and well written. That’s all I ask for.

—moments later after getting lost in a daydream, re-entering the world & I re-reading this post—

This sure sounds like I am searching for excuses to use tumblr even more frequently tsk tsk

"No matter how carefully we defend our selves, all it takes is one footprint of another real person..."

Fri, 22 Apr 2011 13:50:41 +0200

“No matter how carefully we defend our selves, all it takes is one footprint of another real person to recall us to the endlessly interesting hazards of living relationships.”

- Jonathan Franzen, Farther Away (via distantheartbeats)

In Which I Overshare

Fri, 22 Apr 2011 13:45:00 +0200

I became a biker last summer. I joined the ranks of the healthy, environmentally conscious or just really stingy people and traded my bus card for a bicycle. I enjoyed the freedom that came with it- I could choose my own routes, my time was more flexible and it was still much quicker than having to walk from the designated stops. Most of all I liked to bike to town simply because I looked forward to the thrill of riding downhill (I live on a hill) on my way to the city. I also liked the challenge of trying to ride uphill - fighting fatigue, lactic acid and my lazy leg muscles. Getting to the top of the hill without stopping even once made me feel like an Olympic athlete. My imaginary spectators roared with excitement, I accepted my gold medal from some important looking middle aged guy and I waved to my supporters.

Now there’s just one problem with my new hobby - it’s contributing to a sharp increase in the rate at which my wardrobe depletes. To put it bluntly, almost all my pants have holes in the crotches as a result of continuous rubbing against the bike seat. I basically have a full closet of distressed jeans except that all the stress has been focused on one general area - between my legs. Of course I’ve tried running a few stitches to save myself the embarrassment of wearing crotchless jeans in public but because the integrity of the fabric has been compromised, it’s all for nought. On the up side, it’s summer and the extra airflow might not be so bad lol. I hope.

You’re looking at the owner of a brand new BMW. ALL I have to do is send my contact...

Tue, 19 Apr 2011 16:33:00 +0200

You’re looking at the owner of a brand new BMW. ALL I have to do is send my contact information to that lovely lady with the last name I can’t pronounce. It’s a scam only if they say so, right?

N: B This is not a Lottery, it is a promotion therefore if we discover any
abuse or false pretense you will be disqualified, banned and sanction
appropriately, hence confidentiality is advised.

Engr.Ms.Lena Schachter
DIRECTOR OF PROMOTIONS,
THE BMW INTERNATIONAL AWARENESS PROMOTION
COPYRIGHT ©2011. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

So this young woman (I’m talking about myself here) is currently writing her Master’s...

Mon, 18 Apr 2011 16:08:49 +0200

So this young woman (I’m talking about myself here) is currently writing her Master’s thesis. Well that’s the official story. That’s what I tell everyone when they ask if I don’t have classes to attend. I’ll proudly announce that I took extra courses last semester so I could have a free schedule for this term. So what did happen this semester? how much writing/research did I actually do? Well to put it nicely - not much. I’ve taken week long vacations hopping from city to city, sometimes even going abroad. The weather is good and the ticket prices are still down! I haven’t seen my friend(s) in a long time! I have more time! And the list of excuses continues.

I must admit it’s been great this past few months. I’m living my life on the road, living free and without consequence. I feel like a member of the cute/girly version of Hell’s Angels if you substituted motorcycles for buses, trains and planes. I haven’t watched the movie “Planes, Trains and Automobiles” (at least i dont think i have) but based on its title I feel like I am secretly filming the reality show version, only less trashy. Of course the deadline for my paper is fast approaching and of course I am beginning to panic. So like a good procrastinator I shall make good use of that last minute, just as soon as I finish writing this post. I promise. I swear.

*side note: Is this what it feels like to be an heiress, or a kept woman, or someone with almost unlimited finances and absolutely zero obligations?

also, had it not been for my limited finances i would have probably circled the earth twice already instead of settling for budget airlines to backwater places. at least there’s beer!